Well…..so much has happened in my life and it has been so long since I posted anything! But today the Prophet asked us to post about the things we are grateful for….and right now, right here, for today, that is FAITH.
I am so grateful for the concept and principle of faith. It can be as simple as going to bed every night, knowing you will wake up the next morning, to having faith that moves literal mountains. At one point, I thought, I would never have the faith to move a mountain. I mean, think about it, a MOUNTAIN!! That is HUGE! I stand on mountains. I climb them. I take photos of them and hang them on my wall. Compared to a mountain, I am an ant! And yet it is possible to have faith that moves mountains?!! Really??!! That is way more faith than I can even imagine! WAAAYYYY More!
I have been asked to exercise my faith before. I have prayed for sick children, even my very own. I have had to trust that God would take care of me, even when there was no food and no money…..I have exercised that kind of faith. I didn’t have to do it for very long, but I have had to do it. I have had to exercise faith when I didn’t know how we were going to make ends meet, when I had to leave for college without any support from parents or family, when I chose to marry my husband contrary to the wishes of my parents, when I didn’t know if my child would live or die, when I had to forgive a friend, or apologize for my behavior, or move to a new place where we knew no one….I have had to exercise that kind of faith. The Lord has never let me down. He has always been there. Food always showed up, the bills somehow got paid, my child recovered and lived, forgiveness came, and I apologized, even if it was not well received.
There have been other times where I have exercised my faith and things did not turn out as I wished…..we did not get that job, or make that move, my friend died anyway, he did not recover, life did not turn out as I envisioned or I wanted. Does that mean my faith was in vain? No. It means, though I wanted something, even if I wanted it with all of my heart, the answer from a loving Father in Heaven who knows what is best for me….the answer was “No, my Daughter. The answer is No.” I do now know why the answer is no sometimes. I do not know why the answer is Yes sometimes. But I do know this.
God loves me. He knows me. He knows where I am going and He knows what it is going to take to get me there. And if that means that sometimes the answer is No, because it is those experiences that will eventually take me to where I need to go so I can become what He knows is possible for me…..if it means THAT, then I am willing to exercise my faith, and to continue to exercise my faith in Him, even when the answer is NO.
I do not have all of the answers. To be honest, I don’t want all of the answers. That just seems a little overwhelming to me to be responsible for. He has given me enough….enough for today, enough to walk through the coming darkness, enough to believe there will be light, enough to keep going. Today, that is enough.