Old beach photos…no sun!

So life is moving on here at our house!!  I had wanted to blog about our trip to the beach last Monday, but I can’t seem to get my photos to send.  Check that.  I’ve sent them twice and they never show up in my email, so I’m not sure what I am doing wrong.  I’ve done it before and it has worked, so whatever!  Anyway, the day was gorgeous!  There is a little river at the beach and the kids just played and played and played in the water and the sand.  The sun was gorgeous, no clouds (very rare in July, here) and there was a slight breeze.  And I had some decent photos!  Oh well!

So I guess we will have to wait.  I need (want, really want) a new digital camera.  My other one died.  Slim’s died.  Spanky and Sport are gone with theirs.  I will just have to wait. 

this is me now.

We spent the money on glasses—for me!  Scary!  I have never needed glasses.  My vision has changed in the last few months.  Sometimes when I am driving things are blurry.  Sometimes when I am reading the words are blurry.  Sometimes, most of the time, everything is just fine.  I hadn’t been able to explain any rhyme or reason to when I could see and when I couldn’t.  So I went to the optometrist, who said, “Yep, you’re getting older.  Most people’s eyes, around their 40th birthday, will change.  This is just a little prescription, but it will help you.   You need bifocals.”  He said it so matter of factly.  I was beginning to feel my age.  But then he recommended getting progressive lenses.  And he said that I should wear them every day because as I aged I would need them more regularly anyway so to make that adjustment now would be easier than if I waited.  Ugh!  Really?!  So then I went and chose frames.  When I put them on, I thought, “There she is, Grandma.”  None of my grandchildren will know me without glasses.  They haven’t arrived yet, so I haven’t had to deal with that reality (probably next week—that the glasses will arrive, not the grandchildren, sheesh!).  I would show you a picture, but–yep, no digital camera.  You’ll just have to use your imagination—you know, that old fashioned thing!!?

It kind of looks like this

Last week we also laid wood flooring in the Spike’s room, because of his dust allergy.  I’ve had the flooring since we moved into the house.  But I didn’t know where to put it.  When Spike’s allergy tests came back, I knew where it belonged.  We had almost enough for both of the back bedrooms.  We were one box short.  But!!  Awesome news!!  I found it at Home Depot.  But I had to have it ordered to the house because we don’t have one in town, or very close.  But it was only $9.00 shipping, which is cheaper than the gas and time.  So that is on the way too and then we can lay that in the other bedroom.  It was quite a feat because we had to move all the furniture in one bedroom, and rearrange everything so we could move all the bedroom furniture from one room into the other.  We did that one day.  The next day, my super awesome contractor, Trina of Foot Print Construction, put the floor in.  That night we moved it all back.  When the flooring arrives, we’ll do it all again for the other bedroom.  (And get rid of that nasty 70’s, orange shag carpet!  That has to go!)

I am still not caught up on the laundry.  That is what we have been doing here.  So if you wonder why I am not blogging more, it is because I can’t take cool photos and blog about them, and because we are doing some home remodeling before school starts in August.

check out my shadow in the corner

This week, Sun is at Girls’ Camp and next week, Speedy had Scout Camp.  I am just a little jealous because he is going to the camp I attended for Girls’ Camp all of my camp years!!  I wish he could pack me into his stuff and take me along.  But it wouldn’t be the same because it would be full of scouts instead of girls.  Oh well.  I guess I will just have to be a grown-up, with bifocals!  Grandma, right around the corner.

I have two dear friends who currently are fighting for the lives of their spouses.  It breaks my heart to hear of their struggles.  They are amazing and strong women, yet this trial is piercing them to the very core.  One has raised her children.  They are grown adults, happy, functioning, managing their own families and lives.  The other has just begun to send hers from the nest.  She still has five who live at home.

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 I am not going to pretend to know how they feel or to understand that I know what they are going through.  Both women are home full-time to manage the health of their husbands and to manage their households.  The strain that must put on the finances and the toll that must weigh on their emotions, let alone the emotional strain of watching your spouse journey along the road from whence there will be no mortal return, and knowing you will be left to manage the pieces without them, I just cannot fathom the depth of emotional sorrow and turmoil that trial would bring.

I have noticed when we all have trials, there tends to be one of two paths we take.  The trial either brings us to our knees and closer to our God, or in our anger, indifference, and lack of understanding, we turn our hearts away from Him.  Those circumstances which try our souls have one of those two results.  Which one would you choose?

Let’s discuss a little bit of doctrinal principle.  We know that we have been sent here to earth, to test and to try our faith and our character, to see if when the rubber meets the road, we will truly be willing to choose the right.  Now I realize some of you may not think there is a right and a wrong, but for this discussion, let’s assume that there is.  We have a Father in Heaven, who loves us, who knows what kind of a character we need to develop, who understands us perfectly and knows where our character flaws lie.  He is perfectly loving, perfectly kind, perfectly just, and always works within the eternal laws of morality (for lack of a better word, with my limited mortal understanding).  He is involved in the details of our lives, but will not infringe on our agency (our ability to choose right or wrong).  He will lead, guide, and love if we let Him.  If we will not, He respects our right to choose that and He will not force us to choose otherwise.

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With His perfect love and perfect knowledge of us and our character, and His innate desire for our growth and development along certain character lines, He plans or allows to happen, certain circumstances in our lives that will give us the opportunities to choose how we will respond to those circumstances, thus revealing the character of our hearts.  Now, is He responsible for the bad things that happen in the world?  No.  He cannot be responsible for wickedness.  He can however, allow the wickedness of others to come to pass where some people or many people are harmed.  That reveals the character of the perpetrator’s heart, where, when he/she has acted, that person can then be held accountable and judged and punished for their behavior (but that may not happen until after this life is over).  The victims of that wickedness, then have the opportunity to allow the suffering of their trial to bring them to God or to take them away from God.  The response to their trial is their own choice and has its attendant blessings or consequences.

But, sometimes, as in the case of my friends, very trying things happen due to no fault of their own or anyone else.  Their husband’s are both fighting forms of cancer.  It is nothing they or their families have done to deserve what is happening to them.  They are doing the very best they can, with the resources they have, to manage the trial they are facing and to help their families manage the trial in their lives, because each of us will respond based on the condition of our hearts, and we are different people, at different places of development, spiritually speaking.  But each person who the trial touches, has the opportunity to choose to respond with faith or to allow the trial to damage their faith.

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Now, it is important to note, that sometimes we are hurt by another person’s choices who is not intending harm to us or to others around us.  Maybe they are making choices that they think are right or best based on their knowledge and understanding at the time.  We may have greater knowledge and think their choice is wrong or misguided.  We may also have less knowledge than we believe we do, because maybe they aren’t telling us all of the facts, and so we are at odds with their choices even though our position may not be correct.  At these places and times, we can also choose to allow the differences to increase our faith and our relationship, or to damage it.  At these places, it is best if we respond with patience and love.  Sometimes time will tell where the truth lies.  If we understand agency and allow the other people involved in the process to exercise their agency, and we give them our counsel in love and understanding and respect their choices, even if we disagree, we can communicate to them our love and support, and still disagree with their decision.  Then, for our own peace of mind, we can pray in faith that we and they will be lead to greater understanding of the situation and people.

Back to trials that are happening due to no fault of our own, why do you think our Father in Heaven would allow such things and difficulties to happen to us?  Is it because He wants us to suffer?  Is it because He doesn’t care?  Is it because we aren’t significant or important or because if He loved us He would take this suffering from me or you?  No.  None of those things are true.  He perfectly understands that some learning and stretching of our characters can only come in certain and specifically tailored ways.  It is BECAUSE of His love for us that those trial are allowed to happen in our lives.  He recognizes that each of us will choose to turn to Him or to turn away from Him when such trials befall us.  But think about this:  He also already knows how we will respond to that trial.  The trial isn’t for His knowledge, it is for ours.  It is our refining fire.  It purifies, if we allow it, our character and makes us more like Him.

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I dearly hope that when my next trials come, that I will be able to face them with the same faith and perseverance as my friends.  They are amazing and wonderful women.  I love them and hope to be like them.

Here is the breakdown of our trip:

Thursday:  We drove all day.  Began at 5 a.m. and drove until midnight, Utah time.  It was exhausting but we made it.  I was so very, very grateful that we didn’t still live in horse and buggy days or even when only the train was available.  The hotel we stayed in was clean but super old and not well maintained.  The epitome symbolizing its quality—the art on the walls was upside down.  It wasn’t a joke because I tried to flip them over and hang them right side up but there wasn’t the right hardware to hang it that way.  Crazy.

OK…this was just too funny not to post.

Friday morning:  We skipped the continental breakfast because it was not worth our time.  Orientation started at 9 so we took Sport over to the WSC (Wilkenson Center), ate something at the food court, got him all checked into orientation and then Drew, Spanky, and I went to do a session at the Provo temple.  I just felt like I was home.  We had lunch at the cafeteria and then went to visit our friends in Payson.

We spent a couple of hours getting caught up and visiting.  Then we had to pick up Sport from orientation and get him all checked in to his new apartment.  It took the boys about half an hour to get through with their stuff in the main building and to get their keys.  Then we went to their apartment and unloaded their luggage.  While Spanky was getting settled, we took Sport to the Creamery for some groceries. 

This is so Provo…Love it!

Then we took the boys to our favorite restaurant in Provo:  Los Hermanos!  The prices have doubled–but it has been more than 15 years since we have been there.  It was delicious and fun—but more expensive than we had planned.  It was so yummy!!  We also got to see the construction of the new Provo temple, because Los Hermanos is just across the street!!  It was a sweet blessing because when Drew and I lived there before, we attended our stake conferences in the old Provo tabernacle.  To know and see that it is being turned into a temple, was really cool.  The angel Moroni was on top of the building/temple already!!

Then we dropped the boys off and spent the evening with Darren and Kimberly.

Check this out!  One of the photos in the Provo Tabernacle fire!

Saturday:  We spent the entire day with our Payson friends and their family.  Drew and Darren watched the Yankees lose (Darren’s team) and then the Dodgers lose (Drew’s team) and then some World Cup Soccer.  Watching sports and hanging out is what Drew and Darren would do in our early marriage.  Darren had several back surgeries and there wasn’t much he could do.  But both of those men could talk sports and doctrine—that solidified their friendship forever!  (even though Darren is a Yankees fan!)  With Darren’s current level of health, that is about all he can do again, so having a day that Drew could do that with him was a treat!

Saturday evening, we went to a little diner in Payson called One Man Band.  The cook stays behind the counter, menus are on the table.  You pick up the phone at your table and call your order into the counter.  She cooks it and tells you it is ready and then you go and pick it up.  It was an easy place for Darren to get in and out of with his wheelchair and we were all dressed up in our jeans and sweats, so it was fun.  They also have a jukebox that plays 20 songs for a dollar!  Darren chose the music and we just visited with each other.  After dinner, Darren and Kimberly took us on a driving tour of Payson and we got to see the construction site of their new temple.  It will be completed soon I think, probably before the Provo one.

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Sunday was amazing!  Darren and Kimberly started church at 9 a.m.  Drew and I decided to attend our old ward:  Oak Hills 2nd.  We bumped into several people who still live there and knew us.  The entire time we were there I just felt like we had come home.  I just relaxed and enjoyed the Spirit.  The chapel was full and so were the seats half way into the gym—for a ward!!!  Two musical numbers and three speakers—OH the music!  I forgot how amazing the music is in Sacrament meeting!  They have some professional musicians in that ward!  A mom with two young children sat next to us on our bench.  Her children were well behaved but typical children.  She had quiet toys to keep them busy.  After sacrament meeting she said to me, “You must have children or something.  You just have a way with children and I felt no judgment from you at all!  Thank you!”  So I told her that she was right, I had nine.

There was a decent discussion in Sunday school though I don’t know where all the people were—-
Actually, maybe I do.  They had a class for each age of Sunday school:
Sunday school 12
Sunday school 13
Sunday school 14
Sunday school 15
Sunday school 16
Sunday school 17

And for Primary:
Sunbeams A                       Valiant 7B                 Valiant 11
Sunbeams B                       Valiant 8
Valiant 4                             Valiant 9A
Valiant 5A                          Valiant 9B
Valiant 5B                          Valiant 10A
Valiant 6                             Valiant 10B
Valiant 7A                          Valiant 10C

At least 32 other adults were teaching classes, primary or Sunday school!  Crazy Awesome!  I think we have that many adults attending Sunday school and Primary altogether in my ward!

One of the best gifts of the trip for me was vising with Cindy.  I didn’t get to say ‘Hi’ to her at church, but I knew where she lived, so I popped over to say hello.  She had been the Relief Society President when we had lived there before, and I was her vising teaching coordinator.  We spent a lot of time together.  So Drew and I popped over to her house.  She invited us in.  We visited for quite a while and caught up.  During our visit Stephanie Nielsen of Nie Nie Dialogues stopped by (because Cindy is her mother) so we got to visit with her for just a moment or so and I had the opportunity to give her a hug and tell her how much I loved reading her blog and then she was off.

We said our good-byes to Cindy and her husband and then tried to find our boys to say good-bye to them.  We ended up driving around campus for just a little while waiting for them.  About an hour later they called and we went over, said good-bye and headed back to Payson and spent the evening with our friends, laughing and remembering about old times and old people.  In the morning Kimberly told us, “I haven’t laughed that hard in a long time!”  It was a lot of fun and so important for our dear friends!

Monday morning:  We got up, packed up, said good-bye and drove away about 9:30 a.m  We drove all day and landed in Sacramento about 8 p.m.  Drew wanted to drive me to the Sacramento temple and said it would take about 10 minutes.  OK Sure.  So we plugged the coordinates into the GPS.  Drew didn’t like the way we were going and he was sure he knew a better way.  Needless to say, we spent 1/2 an hour looking for it, ignoring the GPS and never got there.  I am positive there is a spiritual application there—in fact, I think I know what it is—I’ll have to put that together and stick it out there later.

Because our Provo hotel wasn’t nice and our Sacramento temple GPS blunder my sweetheart felt bad and took me to stay at a place he knows, a Marriott.  It was fabulous!!  Beautiful, clean, luxurious and pricey!  But the two of us had a wonderful evening and enjoyed a real breakfast at the hotel and then hit the road again so we could drive the rest of the way home.

(To those of our dear friend in Provo/Utah who we didn’t see, just know it isn’t because we don’t love you.  Our time was just so very short!  We would have loved to see you!)

Tuesday:  We arrived home about 3 and had Slim meet us at the rental car place.  By the time we got gas, transferred our belongings and ran an errand for Slim, it was 4.  the kids were anxious to see us and tell us about their days while we were gone.  All of the dishes were dirty and dinner plans had fallen through, so I threw that stuff together.  We ate dinner at 5 and had to be at a baptism by 6.  I was so grateful that I insisted on being home by 3, even though the baptism wasn’t until 6:30.  We needed that time!!

So that was our trip!!

The baptism story is amazing, which is why we had to be home.  Normally we would just let others take care of things, but this one was special.  I’ll tell you about it another day.

copyright: Karen Larsen photography

Dear Friend,

How are things going?  I have been thinking about you a lot lately.  Is life going well for you?  Do you have any concerns or thoughts that are bothering you?  Do you know that I love you?  How is your family doing?

I hope all is going well for you and the family!

Life at our house is just a bit crazy and wild….not too much abnormal though.  Slim is home recuperating for the summer before he begins law school in the fall.  The boy has only had 14 concussions over the course of the last several years.  He gets dizzy if he over does it or if he doesn’t get enough sleep.  Sometimes he gets a head ache.  He really needs to just take it super easy.  At this point, even a part time job is too much for him.  He has been over doing it for too long.  I just hope this short summer will give him enough rest that he can manage his first year of law school.  Crazy boy!

Spanky just broke off an engagement.  We are all happy and relieved at that.  She is a very nice girl, and sweet.  It was his first real girl friend.  They were engaged for 6 weeks.  He finally put together some pieces of their relationship that he was ignoring because he just wanted it to work out.  That’s when he decided that it wasn’t what he thought it was and called it off.  We dropped him and Sport off at BYU last week.  Two days later I got a phone call, “Mom, no one who I want to date wants to date me….”  Spanky, you have been there three days, maybe you should give it a little more time?  Ya….well.  I think he is going to recover just fine.

Scuff is finally in Brazil and making the adjustments necessary to serving in a forgien land with a new language and customs.  But he is doing well!

We dropped Sport off with Spanky.  He is a little slower to adjust.  I’m sure he will love it, but trying to find a job and pay for all of his own expenses and make his own meals is proving a little taxing……but it is coming.  I’m just worried that once he figures out how much there is to do and how many people there are to do it with, classes won’t be so important anymore.  But all of the boys kind of go through that.  I guess it is just his turn.

Speedy now gets to make the adjustment to being the oldest, that is once Slim leaves.  We have already had the talk:  Now you need to be nice and kind and nurturing, the kind of big brother that the other kids can look up to and ask for help from when they need it.  You are no longer the obnoxious brother who isn’t kind.  He is not too happy about his new role.  We’ll keep helping him adjust to his new responsibilities 🙂

Sun is pow-ing through pre-algebra.  We kind of quit doing math in the middle of the semester because we were overwhelmed.  So we are picking it up this summer.  Math has always been her favorite, so it isn’t really difficult for her, we just needed more time than we had available.  And I just remembered, oh ya….she has an audition in August!  I guess we had better figure out what music she is going to be singing and start working on it.  I’ll put that on my list.

Shorty just left for his first camp-out.  He is not too disappointed that none of the other scouts will be there.  He will be alone with four of the adults and they have some huge fishing contest tomorrow.  He loves to fish!!  He’ll catch them, and clean them, but isn’t so hip on eating them.  One day he and his brother brought home 9, count them! 9 trout.  What was I suppose to do with that?  We don’t like fish!  But true mother fashion, I grilled them on the BBQ and we ate some of them.  (Then fed the rest to the cat…shhhh…..)  Yucky fish!

Smiley just finished scout day camp.  It was nice to have something for him to do every day this week.  I had wanted to take the kids to the beach today, but it rained!!  Bummer!  So we caught up on laundry instead.  Slim didn’t do any laundry while we were driving to Utah for the boys (6 days!) so there is a lot of laundry to do.

And while we were gone, Spike Spike’s allergy test results came back.  The boy is not only allergic to milk and peanuts and walnuts, which I knew, but he is also allergic to corn and soybeans. All of those allergies are a class 2 (on a scale of 0-6, 6 being the high).  Those aren’t so bad, except I can tell when he has been exposed to any of them, so he is apparently a very allergy sensitive person.  But then he tested at a class 6 for dust and a class 5 for dust mites, which means, since I am such an AWESOME house keeper (NOT), I get to do a much more superb job in that department.  I spent all of Wednesday dusting his room and vacuuming his bed, under his bed, changing out his mattress, purchasing and putting on one of those zippered mattress bags, and washing all of his bedding.  And we get to get rid of all the stuffed animals and wash all of his bedding and animals once a week, vacuum out all of the couches twice a week, and dust each room each week, along with extra filters on all of the furnace vents.  Luckily I am good at balance and won’t kill myself in the process.  (Did I mention that we have to pull out all the carpet in his bedroom and the other bedroom and replace the one in the family room?  Thank goodness that the Spirit had given me a heads up on that one and we were already in the process of trying to make that happen!!  It isn’t done yet, but I had a feeling it was going to be needed so I started the process.  Yea for small favors!)  Anyway, hopefully by making some of these changes, the boy will be able to breath.  I think his nose has been clogged for about six months and his little eczema has been horrible!  Hopefully that will improve also.

Well, my dear friend, all is well here!  I am in good spirits even though life goes on!!  Also, when we were in Provo, we were able to spend some time with a dear college friend and his family.  It was a sweet blessing!  About a year and a half ago, he was diagnosed with a stage four brain tumor.  They removed the tumor but in the process he lost some of his mobility on his right side and it takes his brain longer to get the words out.  Usually his diagnosis carries with it a 21 month death sentence.  His doctor told him that it is not a matter of if the tumor grows back, but when.  He and his wife are trying to manage his health, their home, and the lives of their six children.  It was a sweet gift to be able to spend some time with him while he is still here in mortality.  It was also a great blessing to hear his testimony that he is not afraid to die.  He knows where he is going and what he will do there.  He knows he has made covenants with God that bind him to his wife and family for eternity and that those things will stay in place even after he passes through this life.  It was great to see that his faith is sustaining him and his family.  We dearly love them.  It is probably the last time we will see him in mortality, so it was a little bitter sweet!  But I got to hug him and hold him and his wife.  Then he had to use his walker to stand next to me he said, “To remind me that he is still taller than me”.  The man is 6′ 2″.  Besides, who isn’t taller than me?!  He always calls me “Caronious!”  Probably because I call him Darronious.  

 

Anyway, now that this email is a short novel, I should probably go and make dinner for my kiddos and sweetheart!  I love you my dear friend!!  Say ‘hi’ to your family for me!

Love Carin

Well, we are all returned from our trip to drive the boys out to school.  It was an amazing and fun trip!!  It was too short!  I wish it had been longer and that we had had more time to visit more of our friends in Provo.  We didn’t get to see most of them.  I will tell you about the trip, but not today.

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Because we have stayed in people’s homes recently, I had the opportunity to watch other families participate in their family scripture study.  It looks different than mine, which is fine!  I just thought it was interesting to note how each family does it.  Maybe it will give you courage, if you are not already doing so, to participate in a way that works for your family.  If you are already having family scripture study, how does it work for your family?  I do not believe there is a right or a wrong way to do it.  The important thing is that you are doing it!  We didn’t do it in the family I grew up in.  Since I have been married to Drew, we have done it almost every night.  We started on our wedding night, seriously!

Our family scripture study has evolved over the life of our family.  While it was just Drew and I, we read a chapter or so every night, and discussed the doctrines we were learning.  When Slim was a baby, we just kept doing that.  As the children got old enough that we thought they were listening and interested, we read directly out of the scriptures for a few verses and then told the story so they became familiar with the stories in the scriptures.  Slim used to tell the story of Nephi and the Brass plates to our families at three years old.  They would laugh hysterically as he told them ‘Laban said: I will kill you and it will hurt!’  As the oldest children got old enough to discuss the doctrine, we started reading a few verses or a chapter and discussed what some of the words and ideas meant and how they apply to our lives today.  Then when the Duty to God program for the young men required the young men to read the Book of Mormon completely once by the time they were a teacher and then again as a Priest, we just had the boy who was needing to complete that assignment be the reader for the family and we had discussions, as well.  Currently, we have kind of continued that trend.  Shorty (11) is our current reader, with all of his siblings before him having been the reader at one time or another, until they have completed reading the Book of Mormon once out loud.  If you are doing the math, that means we have read the Book of Mormon at least 6 times as a family.  In reality, I think we have probably done it about 15 times which isn’t so bad for 25 years.  (I haven’t really counted…..)

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We read our scriptures at night, before we say our family prayers.  When everyone was little and home every night before 8, we all participated at the same time.  Now we read at 8 with anyone who is here and needs to go to bed.  Then we read again with the others when they get home.  This last Wednesday night, I had just finished reading with the littlest guys and put them into bed, when the older ones showed up and we did the entire process all over again.

At our house, we all just gather together and one person reads while the rest of us listen.

Another family we stayed with has two children (11 and 9 ish).  They read scriptures in the morning.  They pull up the scriptures on the computer, which is hooked up to their television.  They each read three or four verses, discuss their meanings and then say the prayer for the day.

The other family we stayed with reads in the evening.  Each person brings their scriptures to their parents bedroom because their father is handicapped and that is where he is.  They each read a page in the Book of Mormon (5 pages) and then the youngest ones read a page in the Pearl of Great Price (2 pages).  Then they pray as a family and spend an extra two minutes or so after the prayer still quiet and on their knees as they listen for the Spirit to answer their prayers.

I know other families do a little kind of a devotional with a thought and a song.

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The thing that I think is amazing is that the Church doesn’t say “Here is how family scripture study should look” and then lay it out for us.  All they say is: “You should be having family scripture study,” and then it is left up to each family to decide what that looks like and how it should function.  As our family has changed, so has the way our family scripture study looks.

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I’ve shared this story before, but I’ll share it again:

Elder Nelson came to one of our stake conferences years ago.  He was discussing the importance of family home evening and family scripture study and its significance in the lives of his children and grandchildren.  He actually told us from the pulpit, “I won’t tell you our family scripture study and family home evenings were always a howling success.  Sometimes there was more howling than success.”  He then went on to say that his children were more successful in their attempts to hold family scripture study and family home evening than he and his wife had been and he hoped that his grandchildren would do an even better job.

This is what it would look like if we did it in the morning.

And to be honest, I am pretty sure our children do not always or even usually remember what we discussed in family scripture study.  But they know we have it.  They know it is important.  Through our obedience they learn that as a family, we value the information in the scriptures and we think it is important enough to follow the counsel of the prophets in holding family scripture study.

What does it look like at your house?

Well, if all has gone according to plan, today Drew, Spanky and I will be able to visit the Provo Temple.  I have names for my ancestors that we will be able to complete the endowments for.

We are in Provo to drop Spanky and Sport off for summer session of BYU—GOOOOO  COUGARS!!! We drove them out because it was a little cheaper to drive than to fly two boys and their stuff, plus we have a dear friend who is terminally ill and we want to be able to see him.  It will be a fun trip but filled with many emotions.  I’ll make a full report when I return.

I am so excited to visit the temple!!!  Our temple is far enough away and our transportation unreliable enough that we do not get to go very often.  I love the feeling of peace I have when I enter the temple.  It envelops my entire soul!!  It is one of the very few places that I can completely relax and enjoy the feelings I have there.  I can lock the outside world away and focus on the things of eternity!

Remember when I told you that the work we do in the temples doesn’t automatically mean that we are ‘making people members of our church’?  We do the work because we believe the Lord requires of it of all people.  We do it because our ancestors who are deceased can no longer do it for themselves.  But we believe all people, living and dead, and those yet unborn, have agency.  They can choose for themselves.  The work is done for them, however, they have the opportunity to choose for themselves whether they want to accept that work or whether it is something they do not want.

I have had experiences where I have felt the love and appreciation of some of my ancestors for doing their work.  I do not feel it every time, however.  I don’t know if all of the temple work I have done for others has been accepted by them.  But I believe some of it has because of the feelings I experienced while participating in the work.

I also LOVE finding out about my family!!  I love genealogy work and learning about who my ancestors are, where they came from and a little about the lives they lived.  I am a product of their effort and time in mortality.  Because of the decisions they made and the lives they lived, I live.  I was born where I was born and grew up in the places I did.  My hair, eyes, body type, in some cases my religion or desires for education, employment, my morality, are all influenced by the choices they made and the lives they lived.  I love living in the United States of America!  I am grateful for my ancestors who left their home countries of Germany, England, Scotland and others so that I would be able to bring up my family and live here in America.  I am grateful for my closer ancestors of my grandparents who made sacrifices to join the church so that I have the gospel in my life and to teach to my children.  The very least I can do to show my gratitude to my ancestors for the sacrifices they made to allow me the blessings I enjoy is to participate in temple work to allow them to have all of the ordinances and blessings necessary for them in eternity.  That is how I feel when I participate in temple work.

Whether they accept the work or not, is their concern and their choice.  I simply provide them the opportunity to share my gratitude with them for their sacrifices.

It will be a fabulous day!!

Yesterday I needed to make a copy of our water bill.  You don’t need to know why I needed to make a copy, just know that I did and I usually do that at Staples because that is one of the only places in town you can make a photocopy.  (Yes, we are little.)

Copyright:  Karen Larsen photography

I had the option of doing it in the morning right after I dropped Drew at work, but had the distinct impression to take care of it later in the day when I would be out again.  OK.  No problem.

Later in the day, at Staples, I put my little piece of paper on the glass top, but the machine kept telling me that something wasn’t right, and it wouldn’t make the photocopy.  Frustrating.  I looked again at the machine and tried to figure out what it was telling me.  I finally understood that it wanted me to move some little green tab on the top lid.  When I did, I could see that there was a piece of paper stuck in there, so I pulled it out.  Someone had obviously used the feeder system and one of the papers got stuck in there.  “Oh, someone left one of their originals, bummer,” I thought.  “I’ll just give this to the Staple guy when I leave,” and proceeded to make my photocopy.

As I picked up the left original and started looking at it, I had trouble figuring out what it was.  The title on top read “Jamaica Kingston Mission” and it had a bunch of phone numbers, names and places that I didn’t recognize.  “Well, maybe other churches have missions too.”  Then I looked a little closer.  “Sister Gantz” caught my eye.  “Sister??!! I think we are the only church that does that!”  I looked closer.  All of the names began with Sister or Elder.  “OK this is definitely one of ours!!  But why would there be a Jamaican Mission sheet here in California??  The only person who this might belong to, would be…
OH!!!  President and Sister Bingham who served in that mission several years ago!”

So I called them on the phone because their number was in my cell phone.  “President Bingham, this is Carin.  I was here at Staples and ——-is this your paper?”

He laughed!  “Yep.  My wife was just there.”

“Great, I’ll bring it right over!” and I did.

Now I am sure some skeptics would say, ‘just a coincidence, a nice one, but coincidence’.  I would say ‘NOT’.  Why?  Because those phone numbers and information were important to Him and His work.  When I dropped the paper off at their home, Sister Bingham said, “Where did you get that?!!”

I told her the story.

She told me that they had just recently returned from visiting Jamaica and were talking with the current Sister who is working the office there.  She hadn’t saved any of the information that Sister Bingham had had from the mission.  She asked Sister Bingham to photocopy the records and send her a copy.  That is why Sister Bingham had been at Staples in the first place.

Now think about this.  If I had finished my photocopying earlier in the morning, I would not have been the one to find that piece of paper and return it to the Binghams.  It would likely have been thrown into the trash.

The Lord is in the details and if we will listen, we can be too.  This thought gives me great peace and comfort.  Whenever I am tempted to think that He doesn’t care or even pay attention to the things going on around me, I can bring to mind many, many more instances where I have seen His hand in the details of my life.

Copyright: Karen Larsen photography.  Isn’t she an amazing photographer??!

 He clothes the lilies of the field.  He notes the fall of every sparrow.  We are His children, who have been fastened after His image.  His work and His glory is to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man, of us!  All the world is His creation.  I guarantee you that He is paying attention, to you and to me and to the details around all of us.  If you cannot hear Him, it is because you need to learn better how to listen.  Because I can promise you that He wants to communicate with you.  He knows stuff you need to know and He does not want to leave you out there without guidance and help.  Start doing the things He asks of you, learn how He has communicated with others, and see if you do not start to hear Him speak to you.  He is there.  He loves you.  You are His child and He will not leave you alone!  Reach out and ask.

I did it!!

I spent 15 (really 30, I think) minutes working on family history Saturday morning.  I just wanted to upload the photos of my grandparents and great grandparents and see how that whole thing works.  It was awesome!!

I just went to familysearch.org/tree and typed in my user name and password.  Then up popped my family tree.  I put my cursor over the word ‘memories’ at the top, then clicked on ‘photos’.  I hit the little green + sign and another one popped up.  I hit that one too.  Then it opened up my computer menu to choose which photo I wanted to upload.

I cropped out the child, because he is still living and did not give his permission.

When the upload is complete, I had the option to add a description of the relationship and had to push the ‘add description’ button.  Then I could alter the title, but also had to click the little green check mark to the right in order to keep it.  There was an exclamation point on the middle right saying that the person had not been tagged yet, click the person to tag them.  So I clicked on them.  A little circle pops up which I can adjust the size of, in the corner, as well as a little window to put their name into.  (I think I had to click ‘add person’ for it to save.)  Then there was still an exclamation point on the right side.  When I moved my cursor over it, it said that the person was not yet linked to family search.  A drop down menu appears and one option says ‘link to family search’.  Poke that link.  Then put your information in to search for your ancestor.  When you have the right one, hit the select button on the right.

I cropped out the child she was holding, even though it was me.

Voila!  Your ancestor has now been uploaded and linked to their family search profile.  Anytime (except when you are viewing the family tree) you or someone else looks up that ancestor, their photo is linked to their name.  Cool, huh?  So I uploaded my grandfather and my grandmother on my father’s side.

I figured they would want the one where they were young and gorgeous, not old and wrinkled!!

 Then I uploaded one photo that included both of my great-grandparents.  I tagged them separately and linked the tags to their individual names and again, Voila!  Uploaded one photo, tagged two people in the photo and their photos were linked to their family search profiles.

So very cool!!  Then you can also add stories or memories to the person as well.  I haven’t done that yet.  But the photo upload thing only took about 30 minutes to figure out and do!  Isn’t that so very, very cool!!

Do you have an amazing experience uploading your photos?  You should try it today—a perfect Sabbath day and Father’s day activity, with the kiddos!  Upload your fathers today!!!

Happy Father’s Day!!

So a dear friend of mine got called as the Relief Society President in her ward.  She is an amazing woman and she will do an amazing job!!  I have worked with her before in a lot of girls’ camp areas.  And she is amazing!  As we were discussing her new calling, she said, “I don’t know Carin, being the RS President is like girls’ camp on steroids!”  I burst out laughing right in the middle of seminary graduation.  Luckily, it was before the meeting had begun and I stifled it quickly.

Her comment caught me so off guard, but is so very true!  It is funny that as we get older we think that we mature (and to some degree, we do), but the older I get, the more I realize that adulthood is just Junior High all over again.  (I mean, minus the children and the bills and the grown-up problems.)  But sometimes, we are just big people with the same feelings and emotions, and unfortunately some of the same drama!

Whenever you are tempted to get sucked into the drama, remind yourself of the things you learned in junior high:

• Play nice.
• Be kind.
• Don’t share private things.
• People will talk about you, especially behind your back.
• Don’t say anything, to anyone, about anyone that you are not OK having repeated to the person, because it will be eventually.
• When people don’t understand your behavior, they will assign reasons that make sense to them, tell others those reasons, and probably never ask you if they are accurate because they are sure that they are.
• If someone saw you do something stupid, it will be shared all over Facebook.
• If you don’t want your mistakes to be shared wide and far, do your best to always treat people with care, concern, and kindness.

That counsel is pretty much true from junior high on (sadly, sometimes in elementary school too).

hawaiidiscount.com

As a grown-up, I have gotten a little better at calling people on their behavior.  If I hear something about someone else, before I tell anyone else, I usually call the person and just ask them if the information is true.  I tend to say, “Hey, I heard that…..”  They usually then want to know what the source is.  Sometimes I just try to let them know that I wanted to make sure they were aware that perception was out there, or ask them if they need any help (with certain situations),  or I wanted to make sure I could return to the source and quash the rumor about them or their family.

I know most of us mean well when we are discussing the situations of others, but we really have to be careful that (1) the information we received is true, (2) our passing of the information will be to help out someone else [i.e. Sister so and so had an automobile accident and is need of some extra service and TLC, we need to help her], (3) the information is public and the person/people don’t mind you sharing their business.

These are all lessons that have been difficult for me to learn.  I am a very open person and I don’t mind people knowing how I feel about something or what my plans are.  I don’t mind being transparent because, truth be told, I really do not have very many negative feelings about others.  I do not hide my relationships or my true feelings about someone.  I let them know.  Sometimes that has backfired on me, but not very often.  Most people appreciate knowing where they stand with me.  The point is, my boundaries are very loose in the information department.  But other people do not feel that way at all.

I am very careful about what information I share about others, even though I am not as tight about my personal information.  I try to put myself into their situation and ask if I am putting them in a good light, or if they overheard me say this, how would they feel?  I think about those things.  My morality professor in college was notorious for teaching us how to decide if something was moral or not:  Moral behaviors help people, immoral behaviors hurt them.  Still today that is how I decided what my behavior should look like.  Does my behavior, or do my words/thoughts help people?  Or hurt them?

itsallkidsplay.com

There have been times when I thought my behavior would help someone, but in reality it hurt them.  Here is an example.  I was over at a woman’s home and waiting for her to do something.  The kitchen was a disaster and things were all over the place.  I started washing the dishes because I wanted to help relieve her burden.  When she returned, she was angry.  She interpreted my dish washing as saying, “Well, you obviously aren’t doing what you need to do.”  When in reality, what I was saying was, “I have had times when my kitchen looked like this too and I wished someone would have helped me by washing the dishes.”

I had another friend who really helped me to see that others were very private about their families and their plans.  One time someone asked me what the friend’s plans were.  I knew they were going to visit their families over the summer and I said so, no details, no specifics, just, “I think they have plans to see their family this summer”.  Well, for that particular friend, sharing that much information was too much sharing.  She was not happy and told me so and it was hard on our friendship.

My point is, most of us really do not know another well enough to always determine what behaviors the other will find helpful and what behaviors one will find hurtful.  We have to be careful.  Our behaviors, words, and attitudes can and will be misinterpreted.  When they are, we need to act with charity, humility, and to try to behave with understanding, like the Savior would.  He understands what someone thinks, how they feel, and why they came to that conclusion.  We do not.  Many, many miscommunications happen because of those things.

welcomebrand.co.uk

I probably have more to say on the subject, but my kiddos are telling me they need my attention and assistance.  So I had better go and see what I can do to help them 🙂

On a sadder note, my little (big) Spanky broke off his engagement on Tuesday.  It is sad, but it is the right decision.  It would have been fun and will be when the time is right!  But as of today, no marriages on the horizon, just lots of missionary stuff.