In our fast paced and busy world where almost every waking moment is or can be filled with distraction and noise, it is tempting to believe that is how life should be.  The truth be told, however, most of us cannot function at that pace for very long before we are burned out and none of us should be running at that speed very often.  However, as the adversary has nothing better to do with his time than to distract us from eternal pursuits and entrench us in sin and misery, we are constantly bombarded with the temptation to join the rat race and run until our hearts give out.  So how do we refocus and make the eternal work of the soul a priority?

copyright Karen Larsen photography

What even is the work of the soul??  Well, to be honest, it is learning how to change negative thoughts, actions, behavior patterns, and beliefs into positive thoughts, actions, behavior patterns and beliefs.  It requires changes of heart and attitude and repentance.  Many times, the things that are holding us back from getting the peace and happiness we want in life are beliefs or understandings that we don’t even acknowledge on a conscious level.  It takes a lot of time and help from the Spirit to uncover those things so we can then change them.

The first thing to do is to make time every day.  It doesn’t have to be long, but it should be quiet and as free as possible from distractions.  Being a mother of many children, I know that is easier said than done.  For me, I try to get up early every morning before the people in my house do.  That is when I say my prayers, read my scriptures, write in my journal, and prepare my agenda for the day.  I personally need about an hour to get out of bed, hit the bathroom, pray, read and ponder.  Obviously, some days I am more successful than others.  It is important to recognize there is an ebb and flow to your process.  It is alright that it doesn’t always look the same.  For instance, if the baby is up all night teething or because he is ill, you may not be able to get up at 5 a.m. having just finally gone to sleep at 3.  Give yourself permission to have an ebb and flow to the work.  As you participate in the process, it will become easier to you. 

copyright Karen Larsen photography

Opening the process with prayer is vital.  As you pray, ask your Father in Heaven to what He would have you do that day or who He would like you to help or what He would like you to focus on.  Then as you read your scriptures with pen and paper by your side, be prepared to write down the specific thoughts, feelings, or impressions you have.  Some of them will make sense immediately, others will need time to incubate.  One morning during my scripture study, I received the phrase ‘girls’ camp’.  Well that’s nice.  What is that all about?  I haven’t been to girls’ camp in more than three years.  I love camp but I don’t think there are any plans for me to attend this year, at least I don’t know of any.  I didn’t have any idea what that meant, just ‘girls’ camp’.  Hmmmmh.   So on went my day.  Later in the day I was looking for something.  I came across my girls’ camp folders, looked through one, found some thank you notes and remembered my earlier prompting.  So I looked for other girls’ camp folders.  I found another one.  Underneath it were some files I didn’t recognize.  I pulled them out and looked through them.  They were and old family home evening lesson, five copies, all with cardstock in them.  I had needed cardstock for one of my primary activities that day, but thought I didn’t have any and would have to purchase some.  Since I had five copies of the lesson, I knew I didn’t need that many and was able to use the cardstock from one of the lessons, print what I needed on the back and use that.  My ‘girls’ camp’ phrase that didn’t mean anything at the time, came in quite handy in finding something I did need later in the day.

More than just finding things and getting help with the little daily decisions, opening with prayer can open your mind and heart and unlock patterns of behavior or negative thoughts that have kept you bound in mortality.  What are your personal beliefs and thoughts about motherhood or fatherhood?  How about that lady in the ward who drives you crazy?  Do you hate your calling?  Or a child?  Or your spouse?  Is there a doctrinal subject you are struggling with?  How is your personal relationship with Jesus Christ?  Or are you too mad at God to think about that relationship?  We are all just mortal, just people, normal people with personal struggles, every day.  The question is what are we doing with that struggle?  How are we managing it?  Are we learning and growing?  Or letting it fester and bother us and destroy our faith and hope?  We can be the captains of our own journey, which can be positive and healing when we allow the Holy Ghost and our Father in Heaven to help us through the atonement of Jesus Christ.  Yes, it can be scary.  We can learn things about ourselves that we didn’t want to know.  But we can also learn how to change things so that our lives can be beautiful and fulfilling and in the process, we clean out the old emotional baggage and free ourselves from emotional, spiritual, and psychological bondage.  Isn’t that what life is all about—change, for the better?  Out with the unhealthy and emotionally damaging, in with freedom and happiness.  You can have it too, but you have to be willing to do the work.

Think about it like cleaning out the garage.  In order to use the space more effectively, like to store the car, have a game room, or exercise room, or just to be able to find everything, you have to clean out all of the garbage and junk that has accumulated.  Your soul or spirit is similar.  Sometimes the thoughts or beliefs you hold there are not necessary or are organized improperly or are no longer helpful or useful to your life.  They bog you down.  It is important to periodically take a look at those things and clean them out so your life can be more fulfilling and you can use that spiritual space more effectively.

Recently, I have learned that some thoughts and attitudes I have about one of my parents isn’t true.  My wrong thoughts and attitudes have led to a lifetime relationship that causes me problems, grief and sorrow.  Because I have been able to understand these previously held beliefs aren’t true, I am able to change my behavior in certain circumstances so the outcomes of our relationship are more validating of my feelings and person.  Previously, I have been a victim of these beliefs.  I fall into the negative cycle of our relationship and do not know how to get out of it.  But as I recognize those beliefs are not true, I can then become an agent in the interaction and not feel like every time I interact with my parent, it ‘turns out like this’.  Does that make sense?  I can’t exactly give you details because that would be unkind.  But the idea is that when I changed my beliefs about what was happening, and see the interactions in a different light, I am then able to change the cycle of our relationship.  In the process of validating my feelings and honestly interacting kindly in the relationship, I do not leave our interactions feelings victimized.  I leave them feeling empowered. 

copyright Karen Larsen photography

This is a lot to take in.  So think about what I have said so far.  Is there something in your life you would like to change—–a belief, a relationship, a behavior???  Deeply think about what your thoughts and beliefs are regarding the subject.  Ask Heavenly Father through prayer to help you identify something in your thought process that is inaccurate.  Take some serious time to ponder and pray about it.  If you don’t have enough time in one day, take little chunks to time over many days.  Make sure your thinking time is quiet so you can really focus and have a conversation with yourself and hear what the Spirit has to say to you.  We’ll talk about what to do with that information another day.

Being a mother of eight boys, I should have enough experience to speak about fathers, right?

I spoke a little in this post about my father’s relationships with his sons, and his relationship with his father.  But lately I have been thinking more about positive father/son relations.  A few years ago, I was prompted that a friend was having a really difficult time and needed my prayers.  I only saw him at school when I was there for the children.  He wasn’t around for what seemed like weeks.  When he finally returned, I asked him how he was doing and mentioned that we had missed seeing him.  He then told me that his father had just passed away and he had been attending to his father during his final days in mortality and taking care of the arrangements after his passing.  He was still visibly tender from his most recent experiences.  I could tell they had a sweet relationship; my friend had even said as much.

When our boys were young, they came to me for help and comfort.  I was their rock, their foundation, their safety.  During their teens, again their relationships with their father struggled a bit.  When they were willing to talk, they usually talked to me.  I enjoyed that part of our relationship.  It was sweet.  It always bothered my husband.  He was glad they were talking to one of us, but when they were hurt and would come to me, he would say, “They always go to you!”

check out Spanky’s photo bomb!

As our boys are becoming and are men, they now increasingly turn to their father, which is fine and doesn’t bother me.  It is sweet to have them call and say, “Hi Mom.  I love you!  Things are good.  Is Dad there?  I really need to talk to him.  And he isn’t picking up his phone.”  Now my husband gets the scoop before me and then he gets to tell me about their conversations, usually.  There have been times when they have conspired together for a secret only to let me in on it later, because they wanted it to be a surprise.  One of these days I am going to meet a prospective daughter-in-law that way, I am sure.

and this one!

I am so grateful they feel like they can talk to their father.  They have someone to look to and help mentor them as they enter manhood and become men, husbands, and fathers in their own right.  Currently, many of them are laying the foundation for their ability to provide for and support their families.  They have questions and they want and need counsel and guidance.  And the amazing man I am married to is there to help them out.

can you believe him?

 He has a great relationship with his father!  He may not think so.  They argue about plenty and do not have the same opinions about most things.  In fact during our early marriage, I was always so surprised that they could have a lengthy and heated discussion about whatever, only to never have it negatively affect their affection for one another (in my house, that kind of discussion meant you were at war).  They just agreed to have a difference of opinion about the issue.  Their love for each other is fierce.  They do not agree, regularly, but their love and concern for one another is evident and consistent.

Our sons grew up in a home where they could have a difference of opinion also.  It wasn’t always pleasant and caused plenty of tension in the air, but our boys always knew they could rely on their father.  He would be there for them even if they disagreed with him.  The ability to have that kind of a relationship, until now, has been foreign to me.  But it is amazing all the same.  Watching my adult sons interact with their father is priceless.  I can only imagine as they become fathers, their relationships will deepen that much more.

my husband actually ‘trying’ to look mad

In my Book of Mormon reading, I have also enjoyed studying the father/son relationships.  (Some of which are located here:  2^nd Nephi 1-4; 2^nd Nephi 31-33; Mosiah 27; Alma 36-42; Moroni 7-10.) 
I really appreciate the fathers pleading with their sons to make righteous and moral choices and then see a few chapters or a book later, the sons then pleading with their sons to make wise and moral choices.  I love seeing that faith and hope passed from generation to generation, for what more do we all want than to see that our children and grandchildren grow up to be moral and happy people who strengthen the community around them?

Family Science literature has just begun exploring the dynamics of the father and child relationship.  I haven’t read many of the studies, but from my own experience, healthy father/child relationship tend to correlate with healthy self-esteem development and greater confidence in their children.  My dear friend and I both struggle in our relationships with our fathers and both of us have difficulty with our confidence levels.  We have both had to work very hard to develop positive self-images and to feel good about who we are and what we can do.

I guess the point to my post is just that fathers play a vital role in children’s lives, particularly their sons, but also their daughters.  I am grateful to have a husband who understands and values his role as father, and that he will pass on positive father/child relationships to his children.

Welcome home Richard!!!  Slim’s best friend returned home from his mission in Bolivia on Wednesday!  We have enjoyed having him here with us for a few days before he goes to see his family!  (They moved right before he left for his mission, but Richard’s records remained here.)  I included Richard in this email because he is a transitional character too!!!  We dearly love him!!

Now, onto the topic at hand.

I grew up in a home where my father was unkind.  Nothing was ever good enough and there was zero praise for a job well done, but plenty of criticism especially if things went poorly.  It was not only aimed at me.  I usually did fairly well, but my siblings struggled much more than I did.

In my father’s defense, I cannot remember my grandfather (my dad’s father) ever saying very much.  We visited them regularly, but I am sure my father and grandfather did not have a very healthy relationship either.  Being that my father continued to visit him, I would imagine their relationship was better than the relationship my grandfather had with his father.  I asked my dad about the relationship between my grandfather and great-grandfather one day.  He could only remember that my grandfather wanted to be as far away from him as possible.

A negative father/son relationship seems to have been passed down through the generations.  My father has continued the trend.  Hi relationships with his sons are not the greatest, either.  Alcoholism is another negative trait that has been passed down that line from generation to generation.  Although my father is not an alcoholic, his brother drinks plenty, his sister married an alcoholic, and my father has a lot of alcoholic behaviors, probably learned from watching his father.

There were some good things handed down through the generations too.  We all love gardening.  My grandfather always had an amazing garden.  My father’s was not amazing but worked fine.  Mine is great if I live in Utah, but pathetic here in Northern California.  I’m not too excited about growing kale.  The zucchini molds and you can only eat so much lettuce.

Positive and negative traits are passed down through the generations.  In the family science literature, a transitional character is one who has changed the patterns of past generations and created new ones that move into the future generations.  For example, a person who comes from a generational history of abuse and then is able to learn new ways to manage themselves and chooses not to abuse their children or spouse would be considered a transitional character.  The actual definition is:  one who changes the course of lineage by filtering the destructiveness out of his own lineage so that the generation downstream will have a supportive foundation upon which to build productive lives.

I first learned about transitional characters in the fall of 1992.  I had just given birth to Spanky in July.  Our first assignment was to make a genogram.  Basically, it is a family tree, however, it emphasizes relationships and behaviors.  You lay out everyone, beginning with yourself, circles for women, squares for men, and draw in the relationships and identify behaviors (positive and negative) passed down through the generations.

This isn’t anyone I know, just an example.

On one side of my family was alcoholism and emotional abuse.  On the other side, child sexual abuse.  I knew I was a transitional character, or could be, by not allowing these destructive behaviors to be passed on to my children.  I broke the cycle, just as Richard will break the negative cycles of behavior in his family.

Here is an example of a specific turning point before I went to college.

I came from a yelling family.  We yelled a lot and were yelled at a lot.  One day (I was about 14) my brother and I were arguing (yelling) at each other.  As I was yelling I remember thinking, “What is the point of all of this?  Yelling is not making any difference.  It isn’t going to change his opinion or mine.  We aren’t getting anywhere.  My voice hurts, my face is red, and I am mad.  I do not like myself when I am yelling.  I am not going to do this anymore.”  And I quit, just like that.

We may not be able to change things as easily.  But as we recognize things that we want to change and behaviors that we do not want to pass down through the generations, and we make effort not to, the Lord will help us make those positive changes in our families.  He doesn’t want them passed down any more than we do.  In fact, He will not only help us break negative cycles, but will also help us to institute positive ones.  Family Home Evening, family scripture study, and family prayer were not cycles that were present in my family of origin (the one I grew up in).  My parents tried them once in a while, but nothing that ever stuck.  We have instituted them in our family and they are here to stay.  Those little things help us to have a happier family.  The spiritual influence of those choices makes a difference in our daily attitudes and how we treat each other.  Our relationships are happier and healthier.  I think my children will do an even better job than Drew and I have done.

I’ll close with this parting comment.  Elder Nelson came to one of our stake conferences years ago.  He was helping us to understand the importance of family scripture study and he said these words, “Family scripture study in our home was not always a howling success.  Sometimes there was more howling than success….”  (paraphrasing now) but our children have done a better job than we did as they have built on our foundation.  And our grandchildren are doing an even better job.

As we make efforts to institute positive changes into our families and eliminate negative ones, we pave the way for successive generations to do better than we did and have more stable and happier families!  You can do it too!

Congratulations again Richard!!!  You will be an amazing transitional character!

We found out late last night that Sport has been admitted to BYU!!!!  Yea!!!  Provo and Idaho!  Hooray!  We are so very excited for him!  He is so very excited for him!  Last night he was sitting at the computer and I told him it was probably time to shut down facebook.  A few minutes later I heard him hooping and hollering, both hands high in the air, “Yea!!! Whoohoo!  I’m in!  I am leaving for college in a few months!”

Those are sweet parenting moments!  Yea for all your hard work and effort Sport!  It has paid off!  Congratulations!  We love you and are so very happy for you!

OK Some things just have to be documented with or without photos.

Remember this talk by Elder Oaks??  Well, apparently today I am working only on ‘good’ things.  This morning, I called my very dear friend to find out how her talk in sacrament meeting went yesterday.  I talked to her for a little more than an hour.  When we started the kiddos were still sleeping.  (It is their last day of President’s week vacation.  The big boys were at school and Drew at work, so I let them sleep in.)  I had made muffins for breakfast, so those were ready and I just kept talking.

Feeling like I needed to get off the phone, I did so, only to jump onto the computer, check my blog and read my missionary emails.  Because of our schedule, I knew I wanted to have lunch about 11:30.  The afternoon plans are crazy but the morning was laid back.  I have adopted a couple of missionaries from here whose parents no longer live here.  We have one coming home on Wednesday, so I was checking the details of his arrival.  One missionary was worried about appendicitis, so I was checking his status.  And one had broken her glasses and was asking for assistance to help with those things.  No  big deal.  In the process, I got sucked into cleaning out my email inbox (big problem, black hole).

I realized I needed to go to the bathroom, so I left the computer.  After exiting the bathroom, I noticed that the boys, who were suppose to be cleaning their bedroom, had found the batteries to the gaming console and were beginning to play ‘Mappy’ and ‘Pac-man’ (the only gaming I allow in the home).  I called them on it and told them to put it away until their room was clean.  It was then I noticed the wet spot on the floor and the baby walking funny.  ‘Sun, did you change the baby’s diaper like I asked?’

‘Uh, no.’

‘OK, do that now.  I will get him some clean pants.  And who put all of this smootie pop all over the floor?’ (frozen chunks of smoothie spread out in front of the TV).

‘That was the baby.’
‘It was me, Mom,’ said Spike.

I started to clean that up with baby wipes and again sent the boys off to clean their room. 

After Sun changed Spike’s diaper, I asked her how far she was on her homework.  She hadn’t yet started this morning.  I gave her the look.  She hid.

Then I walked into the kitchen to see the billowing smoke of the scalding pot of boiling grain on the stove-top.  “What??!!  Who left this on??”  Grabbed the pot, turned off the stove, turned on the faucet and filled the pot with water.  And noticed it was 11 O’clock.  So much for lunch at 11:30.

All of this was done while only FOUR of my nine were home and for the most part we were all in the same room, only with my back to them while I was on the computer.

Needless to say, the boys are now cleaning.  The baby has been changed.  I threw in a load of laundry.  Sun is working on homework. Nothing is burning the house down and now I have to tackle lunch and paying attention to my people.

So here I sit at the computer documenting the chaos.  Onto the better and best parts of the day!!!

Happy Monday to you and yours!

From my earliest recollections, all I ever wanted to be was a mother.  I am not sure what it was that drew me that direction.  (To be honest, I am pretty sure it was a pre-existent desire.)  I longed for the opportunity to help others, to love them, and to serve them.  Being the oldest of six children, I thought I had a pretty good idea of what mothering was all about and what it would require of me.  I was wrong on both fronts.

I did go in with my eyes open.  I knew about taking care of babies.  I participated in the cooking and the cleaning in the house I grew up in.  I babysat, a lot, both for my family and for others. 

heartland-eye.com

As I matured, I learned about myself, things I liked and didn’t like.  I spent a lot of time playing basketball and playing my trumpet, probably 15 hours a week for bball and 10 hours for music.  Those things were sacred to me.  When I married, I could still do those things, just not quite as often.  But when I became a mother, that was a different story.

I had to let go of the things I loved in order to choose to love the people I created.  I still miss those things.  I was really, really good at both of them, and I loved them, they were a part of me.  But I had to make space to be more. 

Right before I married, I had just decided that I had enough confidence in my ability to play that I wanted to try out for BYU’s womens’ basketball team.  I decided to take a basketball class to bone up on my skills before try outs.  Playing basketball messed with my menstrual cycle.  When I started the class, the issues came back.  I prayed and prayed and prayed to have things settle down so I could play.  The response was a simple one.  “You can play basketball or you can have babies, but you cannot do both.”  What?!  That cannot possibly be right!  I want both!  I prayed for the Lord to let me have both.  “PLEASE!!!”  I begged.  The answer was always the same, “you can play or have babies, but not both”.

What?  You didn’t hear about Carin the famous basketball player for BYU??!!  Oh!  Well, obviously I chose babies.  Duh!

Being a mother has required more of me than basketball ever could, or even being a famous musician.  Motherhood has required my very heart and soul.  It is 24/7, 365 days a year, without a break, so far for 23 years running, on call all nights, no weekends, no holidays.  Occasionally I have a small respite when I have spent a week at girls’ camp (but then I am mother to 8-12 young women who are not my own) and I think I have gotten away for one weekend without kids.

What motherhood has cost me in time and energy and money can probably not accurately be quantified.  But what it has given me in growth and satisfaction cannot be measured.

I am kinder, more patient, more considerate, and more knowledgeable about everything from bugs and diapers, to Calculus, and people.  I am much more compassionate.  I recognize distress sooner and can soothe it more completely and faster.  My heart has changed.  I am becoming a new person.  Each child challenges me in a different way.  I am becoming more like Christ.

turnbacktogod.com

That is only happening because I am allowing my calling as mother to permeate my heart.  I am embracing the process of my transformation.

I wrote this to a friend:

Karen Larsen Photography

veooz.com

I have loved watching the Olympics over the last few days.  Watching the athletes put their practice, endurance, and skills on the line for everyone to see in competition with others who have trained just as hard is amazing and heartbreaking to observe.  What really touches my heart, of course, are the stories behind the performances.  For instance, I loved hearing how Noelle Pikus-Pace had retired, stopped competing, began her life after her sport and then with her family decided that maybe she had one more Olympic appearance in her.  Sometime before retirement, she was hit by a four man bob-sled, broke her leg and had to recuperate, rebuild, and retrain.  In the interim between retirement and her return, she had a baby and a miscarriage.  When she finished this year, she came away as the silver medalist and was so excited she climbed off of the track and into the stands to hug her family and celebrate her victory, all the while repeating, “We did it!  We did it!”

cnn.com

I particularly like women’s figure skating.  Last night I watched Adelina Sotnikova skate for Russia’s first gold medal in women’s figure skating and beat out the reigning gold medalist from 2010 Yuna Kim of Korea.  Their skating was beautiful.  Each competitor had their own story.  One skater had lost her mother in the last several years (Mao Asada of Japan, placed 6th) and was skating for her.  The bronze medalist, Carolina Kostner from Italy had disastrous performances in two previous Olympics.  Her mother told her to enjoy her skating and show the people why she loved it.  All the commentators could say was how much different her skating was this year compared to any other performances, and she walked away with Italy’s first medal in women’s figure skating.

As I watched these amazing athletes perform for the world, it hit me.  We all have medal stories.  We may not be world-class athletes.  We may be completely unknown and anonymous.  Maybe no one knows our medal story.  But if you think about it long and hard enough, I bet  you have one.  You should think about putting it on paper so your posterity can read them and gain faith and strength from your example.

Mine would go something like this:

Carin was born the oldest of six children.  Her parents were sealed in the temple just months before she was born.  As the family grew and stress increased, so did marital dissatisfaction.  By the time Carin was 14 the family did not attend church very often.  Finally at 18, her parents divorced leaving her and her siblings (ages 16, 14, 13, 10, and 9) wondering what that meant for their lives, who they were, and how their parents felt about them.

Carin was able to leave the situation and attend Brigham Young University for a year and a half before she married her sweetheart, Drew.  Carin and Drew determined they never wanted divorce to be a part of their lives.  They agreed never to mention the ‘D’ word as a means to solve their problems.  Over the next seven years and four children, she finally finished her degree in Family Sciences.  During that course of time, her oldest son perforated his bowel at a month old, almost died on the operating table, and had a colostomy for 2 and 1/2 years.  His medical issues required 4 major abdominal surgeries and 7 minor  reconstructive surgeries.  Two weeks after the birth of their second child, they found a heart murmur which, thankfully, did not require surgery but did include many doctor visits and a year’s worth of medication.  During these years, she was only able to take 6 credit hours a semester, taking off a semester each time she delivered her sons, #3 and #4.

After 8 years in Provo, UT Carin and her family were finally able to begin to make ends meet financially.  It was at this point, they were asked to leave.  They knew their destination was northern California but knew no one there and didn’t have any connections.  They looked for a job for two years before finally finding one.  Unfortunately it paid only 1/2 of what they had been making in Utah.  Knowing that we are counseled to be financially independent, and also knowing that their destination was the Lord’s desire, Carin and her Drew prayed with faith to be able to make the move.  She cut a deal with the Lord.  She would go, if He would guarantee that she would not have to enter the workforce to make their finances meet.  She was unwilling to go if the children would be placed in daycare.  After 10 years in Provo, they made the move, while 20 weeks pregnant with their fifth son.

Northern California would prove to be a fertile ground for growth.  The years were lean and hard.  Carin and Drew learned first hand how to handle persecution both from within and without of the church.  Though they were surrounded by people, sometimes with friends, they learned how to gain strength from one another and to rely on their faith and their family:  husband, wife, and children.   They continue to reside in Northern California where they have added four sons and one daughter to their family.

After 24 years of marriage, Carin and Drew have six children remaining at home.  Three of their nine have served or are serving missions.  Three are in college.  Three have degrees with a fourth graduating this coming May.  The others have plans for colleges and missions.  We will watch closely as their post Olympic story unfolds.

Dec 2012, Spanky serving his mission in Orlando, FL

Success?  Well, there is still a lot of story to write and time to unfold.  But I do believe there is success in our effort.  We have overcome many, many obstacles, set-backs, disappointments, and heart-ache (all of which have not been shared).  I am sure we will experience many, many more.

I know if you take a long and real look at your life and what you have accomplished, you will see your own Olympic medal story, because that is why we are here, to learn to have our own ‘Happily Ever After.’  And here is the best part, if you don’t like your story or think it isn’t inspiring or motivating, you can work to change it—-today.  You can change the direction you are headed and make a fresh start and create your own happy ending.  What are you waiting for??  Go write it down!!

President’s Day is a holiday here in the United States.  In February, we celebrate the birthdays of two of our very amazing presidents, Abraham Lincoln and George Washington.  Because they are close together, some school districts give us an entire week off of school (at least here in CA).  In other states, you may have two to four days off. 

Abraham Linoln courtesy of The New York Times

Yesterday was the first day of our president’s week holiday and everyone was home from work and school.  Though it was a holiday for them, they all had extra things they wanted my help with, which made it not a holiday for me, except that I was surrounded by my sweet family.  I just thought I would run through the day with you.

George Washington (ethicsalarms.com)

In the morning, 7 a.m., the four boys who remain at home went to put out flags in our community to celebrate the holiday.  About 7:15, I realized they were all gone and that meant the baby was left down stairs by himself.  I went down stairs knowing he can now open the front door and escape out of the house.  Luckily, the boys had been responsible and left out a door that he cannot open, leaving the lock that he cannot open on the front door.  And, as sweet big brothers would do, they put in his favorite movie.  He was in front of the TV when I got down the stairs.

After breakfast and internet catch-up (blog, email, cnn), I sat down with Sun and we planned out all of her homework for the week.  (We have struggled to keep her up to date with her classes.  She has kind of had vacation days throughout the year and now has to play catch up while everyone else is on break.  Poor girl.  Hard lessons, hopefully learned!)  I just let her know that if she wanted to have any privileges this week, she has to complete the assignments on her list first.  (It worked amazingly yesterday!  Today may be a different story.)  That took us until 11:30.

Then we fixed a quick lunch and made bread for dinner.  Drew had promised the little boys some time at the church playing basketball, so at 12:30, we spent 20 minutes there.  We dropped Sun off at piano and then made some photo copies and faxed some paperwork for health insurance for the older boys, and took Sport driving.  He finally received his permit (license to learn to drive).  [The fees before 17.5 years old are astronomical and ridiculous!]  We drove with him for an hour.

We arrived home at 2:30.  Drew dropped us off and headed to the office where he had some work that needed to be caught up.  From there, Speedy wanted me to sit down with him and discuss his options for a college major and to help him plan the classes he would need to take to accomplish that.  Which would be fine, if he had any idea of what he would like to do.  He still isn’t sure.  But that’s OK, the boy is only 14!  He has some time.  That took two hours.  By then it was time to cook dinner, and of course, we had one basketball practice.

Family Home Evening has been moved to tonight.

As much as I love playing and watching basketball, I am counting the down the days until we are finished with the crazy schedule!

My plan for my holiday??  Do the laundry.  But that didn’t happen either.  Guess I’ll move that today as well!  What do you do on your holidays?

As a mother of boys, this Mormon Message really touched my heart.  I cannot tell you how many times we have struggled with similar issues in our home…….jealousy of another sibling.  It definitely has gotten better as we have aged, but as this video shows, it isn’t always the case.

Yea for Elder Holland for putting things in perspective!

OK, I also had to include this one:

I have loved this story for a long time!  I just didn’t remember that it belonged to Elder Holland.  But I love the visual that Heavenly Father allowed them to go down the wrong road a short distance, so they would know without a doubt that the longer road they were on was the right one. 

When I heard the story, it was told that the right road was much longer and they traveled for several hours in the dark and if they hadn’t taken the shorter road in the daylight but instead immediately started on the longer road, they may have second guessed themselves and doubled back, not knowing which road was right.  Then they would have been lost in the canyon’s freezing temperatures overnight.  However, knowing that the shorter road was the wrong road, they had peace and a sure knowledge the road they were traveling was the right one, regardless of the time it took to travel it.

Love Elder Holland!  He has always been one of my favorites……..possibly because he was the president of BYU when I first attended!!