Check out this cute bag that I made for my little Sun!!  She is not a big back pack fan….she likes girlie bags!
She needed a new one and I had the stuff at home…didn’t buy a thing!!  Just had to use my brain a little, unpick the times I sewed the pockets closed and viola!!!

Here is an inside view:

So I totally wish that I had all of the time I wanted to blog.  But I am a busy mother and life keeps happening and I am not as on top of things as I would like to be so blogging has to be more sporadic than I would like it to be. 

Today…..I had a few moments to listen to a few small messages, so I share them with you to let you know that I am thinking about you and wishing that I, like Nephi, were an angel and could have the wish of my heart…..but I need to just bloom where I have been planted and that means less time on the computer and more time in the lives of my children and my family.

But here are some sweet, sweet messages to ponder:

And my favorite today:

Have a great day!!

Well….I dropped seven pounds in two weeks!  OK, spiritual??  Well, kind of.  Let me explain.  I have been fighting a huge ‘drop weight’ battle since I got married.  With each child, I have added at least 10 pounds.  What was once only 20 pounds overweight, has turned into 60 pounds overweight.  Over the years I have tried various weight loss programs, always tied down by the fact that I have no money to spend on fads or other awesome weight loss programs, so I am resigned to things I read and my own personal self discipline or lack thereof.  Not a winning program!  But in the last two weeks, I have discovered a miracle, which is this:

I don’t have to be perfect all the time!!  You heard me right.  Let me repeat:  I don’t have to do it perfectly all the time! 

I have struggled with the fact that I never can completely fulfill something perfectly.  I always cheat or blow the plan and then because I blew it, I give up and I don’t do it or I just think, I’ll start again tomorrow.  This time, I have made smaller more realistic goals, like walking four times a week instead of six, dropping 2 lbs this week, instead of eating the plan exactly (or dropping 20 lbs)! and making sure I am reading my scriptures and saying my prayers.  I don’t have to be perfect, but if I try to keep the goals in mind and I eat more vegetables than other stuff, then it hasn’t seemed to matter that I stuffed down two cupcakes and a brownie that day because I also ate a huge salad and for dinner had more vegetables than rice or bread or potatoes.  And the weight is slowly but steadily coming off because I am more consistent about basic principles instead of beating myself up because I am not completely perfect in the program.

This is a fly-lady principle….that may not mean anything to you, but this is it:  A little is better than none and more consistency with the little will add up in the long run.  So how is this spiritual??  Well, it works with spiritual stuff too.  So you don’t say your prayers or read every single day, or that isn’t manageable for you ….a little is better than none.  Don’t just give up!!  Do it when you think about it and keep working on it.  Eventually your good decisions will outweigh your bad decisions and the little will add up to a lot in the long run.  FHE too….whatever the principle is you are working on, tithing, reading scriptures, going to church…..just keep swimming, just keep swimming, what do we do?  We SWWWIIIIIMMMM!!  Think of it as the ‘Dory’ principle 🙂

Happy Birthday little angel!!  This week you signed ‘more’ to me when you wanted more chili.  I can’t believe an entire year has gone by since you joined the family.  We love you more today than when you arrived.  So much fun!!!  We can’t wait to see what the next 50 years will hold for you!  Love ya’ Baby!!  Mom!  (So I didn’t crop out the toes….oh well….next time!)

I have a Bachelor’s degree in Family Science (FS) from BYU (Brigham Young University).  FS is a branch of psychology which emphasizes systems theory (studying relationship systems and groups, as opposed to individuals, which is traditional psychology).  BYU now has the School of Family Life which focuses on The Family: A Proclamation to the World.  I’m not sure what my major is called now, but suffice it to say, I had many, many, many classes on families and development.  Coming from a broken home, I am extremely passionate about what makes families function, and not just work, but THRIVE!!

I LOVE the Incredibles because of all the principles at work in the lives of this family.  I won’t be able to tell you everything I see in one post, or even two….so you’ll just have to come back periodically and see what else I have to say… 🙂  Today, I’ll just mention two.

‘More than Mr. Incredible’ Principle:
As they are saying their vows, Elastigirl says to Mr. Incredible, “If we are really going to make this work, you’re going to have to be more than Mr. Incredible.”

Isn’t that so true??  A lot of times during the dating/courting process both the man and the woman are so enamored with each other flaws are not so apparent.  In order to really make the marriage work, we cannot rely on those rose colored glasses of early courtship.  It takes more….  usually MUCH more.  It isn’t enough to focus on the more shallow public perceptions when deep flaws are noticed through the day in and day out process of married life.  It requires growth and patience on the part of both people……. usually over years of time, as all of us have rough edges that are painful and difficult to remove.

‘Everyone is special’ Principle:
Dash is driving home with his mother after being called into the principal’s office.  Mrs. Incredible is trying to explain why his behavior is inappropriate and other ways he might express himself.  Dash, defending himself, says, “Dad always says our powers make us special!”
Mrs. I:  “Everyone is special, Dash.”
Dash (under his breath):  “Which is the same thing as saying ‘No one is’!”

I LOVE how each person in the family is ‘SUPER’ in a different way.  Their gifts are unique, just like in life!  Each person is unique and special.  It is their individual gifts that allow them to offer something that no one else can to the world around them.  Sometimes their strength can compensate for the others’ weaknesses and sometimes others’ strengths compensate for their weaknesses.  Awesome!!!!

I have a TON more, but my own little Jack, Jack is calling for me.  Like Jack, Jack, we are not exactly sure what his gifts are yet, but we know they are there!!  Sorry I can’t just write them all now!!  Til next time!

This is a photo of my mom’s family….most of them.  My aunt Sherry passed away last month.  My aunt Marie, aunt Janelle, uncle Buck, aunt Leona, my mother, and cousin Johnathan (Sherry’s oldest) are pictured in this photo at Sherry’s funeral.

I didn’t know my aunt very well.  She lived in Texas and we lived there until I was almost 8.  All of my memories of her and her family are from before then.  It is so neat to see her siblings together, missing my aunt Sheila, the baby of the family.  They look GREAT, don’t they?  I think my mom isn’t comfortable going grey yet….too bad….I love her anyway. 🙂  I had no idea my cousin was sooooo very tall!  My uncle isn’t short!

Anyway, thanks Marie for sending the photos!  I wish I could have attended the funeral!  I am so very glad Sherry has reunited with her sweet husband, a son, her parents, and a dear grand-daughter!  Sweet peace dear auntie!

I LOVE where I live!!  On the 4th of July, we drove 30 minutes away, took a 20 minute hike and ended here:

Now, this photo doesn’t really do the scenery justice.  This ledge sits about 30 feet above the ocean so you can look down over the edge and see it crashing on the rocks below.  You are out in the ocean so it feels like it surrounds you…about 280 degrees around.  We even took all the kids and the baby!!

The trail right before you hit the ledge.

My little one makes the silliest faces:

This week, in addition to our nation’s birthday, I have 3 family members with birthdays:  My sister, happy 33rd!  and two sons–one turns 20 and the other 18!!  Happy birthday guys!

One of my very dearest friends celebrates her birthday as well.  So without embarrassing her too much—-yes I am talking to you Mrs. July 3rd!  I always enjoy your company!  Even though you have your own problems, you are an inspiration to me.  I receive strength from your example and perseverance.  I love talking doctrine with you.  You know your stuff and I learn from our discussions, even though they don’t happen as often as I would like.  (Not because of you…one of us is just a little busy  ???)  I miss having you live where we can interact personally every day.  Thanks for being my friend, for teaching me and encouraging me to be better.  I am a better woman from our friendship.  I love you!  Happy (late) birthday!!  You are always in my heart!

My baby started walking!!!

He has also started screaming for things he wants, yelling when things are taken away, head-butting when he is mad, banging his head on the floor when he is frustrated…..

Growling, hugging, kissing, and is finally learning to fall asleep by himself.  It just takes 1/2 an hour each evening of me lying beside him while he tries to figure it out!  Sheesh!  Like I said, high maintenance!

I forgot to add Heather’s Link up…..HERE

The view (right)

The view (middle)

The view from our summit (left)

My son took me hiking the other day….  just the two of us.  Originally we were going to take the entire family but when he said the words, “Ya’, the kids would HAVE to obey or they could really get hurt,” I suggested we hike alone to see if it would be something the little ones could do.  Usually they are pretty obedient, but they have their days and their moments and I didn’t want one of those to be during a hike I was unfamiliar with.

I LOVED IT!!!  When I go hiking with the girls—I do pretty well, don’t need a lot of rest and push pretty hard….      But I am in NO shape compared to an extremely athletic 21 year-old male.   I am old, fat, and SLOW!  I constantly had to ask for him to slow down, to which he would reply, “I thought we were going slow…..”  Ugh!  It was a steep climb, not the steepest climb I have done, but definitely steeper than these old lungs and knees could manage well.

I enjoyed my time immensely!  We talked about normal stuff—friends, school, girls, the gospel, the ward, family.  I felt like a real person—not just the cook, diaper changer, personnel manager, milk lady.  I don’t know what it is that is so difficult about early motherhood that makes you feel invisible………….
Oh, ya’ I do.  It is this:

“In speaking of mothers generally, I especially wish to praise and encourage young mothers. The work of a mother is hard, too often unheralded work. The young years are often those when either husband or wife—or both—may still be in school or in those earliest and leanest stages of developing the husband’s breadwinning capacities. Finances fluctuate daily between low and nonexistent. The apartment is usually decorated in one of two smart designs—Deseret Industries provincial or early Mother Hubbard. The car, if there is one, runs on smooth tires and an empty tank. But with night feedings and night teethings, often the greatest challenge of all for a young mother is simply fatigue. Through these years, mothers go longer on less sleep and give more to others with less personal renewal for themselves than any other group I know at any other time in life. It is not surprising when the shadows under their eyes sometimes vaguely resemble the state of Rhode Island…….

“It is this realization,” she says, “that I try to recall on those inevitably difficult days when all of this can be a bit overwhelming.”  (Excerpt, Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, “Because She is a Mother,” April 1997, Full text here)

He says it so well.  We are everything —  the entire world to our little children, and yet we usually have ZERO personal time or space, or suppose to have any needs.  I still do not always feel like I can breath with this little person.  He is so demanding.  He is still up 2-3 times a night, at 11 months!!  A lot of the time he sleeps in my bed.  Now lest you decide to argue with me and tell me to just put my foot down, please remember that I do have 8 other children and NONE of them were still getting up every night at this age.  I know how to help them learn it.  This one is just on a different learning curve.

So what did I learn from my hike:
1.  Four hours of ME time was glorious!!!!
2.  But still probably too long for my little one.
3.  I would exercise that hard and long everyday in the outdoors with good company (like that would happen!)
4.  The hike was too much for the rest of the family.
5.  We would have been in danger if we had taken the entire family.
6.  The view was totally amazing (see above) and worth the climb, even with only cell phone photos.
7.  I really LOVE being a mother to my oldest (who, by the way, up to this point has given me my very most difficult parenting moments and learning experiences).
8.  If child #9 turns out like child #1, the hike will be long and hard, but the view will be amazing and totally and completely worth the journey.
9.  I do love these two high maintenance individuals:

10.  We can still do things when we are older that we did when we were younger…….  it just takes us longer.  Hopefully we do it with our eyes and hearts more open to the process.

I have had trouble feeling the love of the Lord lately—not in general, just specifically for me.  Part of that struggle, I am convinced, has been my lack of strict obedience in the scriptures and prayers department.  Part of it has been all of the adjustment happening over the last year…..from adding a new baby, Drew being called as the Bishop, sending out one missionary, having another one come home, and sending one boy off to college.

Some days I don’t feel like I have time or energy to breathe.  I stuff all of those emotions inside just so I can keep functioning—everyday getting out of bed to manage the affairs of my family and yet never getting to the ‘I want to do’ list.  And in the process, I quit being diligent in saying my prayers and reading my scriptures….functionally, I cut off the life-line that was keeping me afloat.  If I was only functioning on emotional life support, I decided to turn off the machines and let myself go.  I quit believing there was much ‘personal point’ to the journey.  Not a very good place to be.

I attended a baptism the other day—an amazing baptism!!  This man had left the church—I don’t know for how long or what his sins were—but he had been gone for a long time.  A few days ago, he was rebaptized—forgiven of his past and again welcomed into the fold of God.  I felt some of the love the Lord must have for him at his return.  I had a little extra insight because someone close to me has gone through the same process.  I felt his joy and witnessed his gratitude for the marvelous gift of repentance and his willingness to recommit to obedience.

My husband shared this scripture:
Moroni 6:1-8
1 And now I speak concerning baptism. Behold, elders, priests, and teachers were baptized; and they were not baptized save they brought forth fruit meet that they were worthy of it.

I didn’t have my own lamb photo, so I borrowed a free one.

My strength is not always in recounting history or understanding it per se.  But I am really good at application of principles.  So here is my attempt at connecting a portion of history with the current applications of the principle of sacrifice.  I am sure there are many of you out there who know and understand more than I do.  Feel free to comment 🙂

The Lord has always required sacrifice of His people.  In Old Testament times and under the Mosaic law, the sacrifice was a blood sacrifice, to symbolize the coming atonement of the Lord Jesus Christ.  A lot of times we brush right past that thought and we do not look at what that really required of the participants.  Now, I am no expert but….

These animals were the best that they had to offer.  Some of the requirements were that it was a male animal without blemish.  It is my understanding that these people raised these animals—they were their pets–they loved them.

The Bible Dictionary, under sacrifices states, “It is noteworthy that when three offerings were offered together, the sin always preceded the burnt, and the the burnt, the peace offerings.  Thus the order of the symbolizing sacrifices was the order of atonement, sanctification, and fellowship with the Lord.”

Sacrifice is a law.  It is required of us.  In our day of me and mine and my rights and I want it now—sacrifice seems like a very foreign concept.  But it is still a concept and it is still required of us.  So then the question becomes:  How do we practice the law of sacrifice today?

Today the Lord requires a different kind of sacrifice.  3rd Nephi 9: 19-20 states, ” ye shall offer up unto me no more the shedding of blood….and your burnt offerings shall be done away….And ye shall offer for a sacrifice unto me a broken heart and a contrite spirit.”  The Gospel Principles Manual says that means “that we offer deep sorrow for our sins as we humble ourselves and repent of them.”  In the dictionary, contrite is defined as grieving and penitent for sin or shortcoming.

If we truly understood the scriptures and really believed them, i.e. no unclean thing can dwell with God (1st Nephi 10:21); we would understand that the tiniest sin of omission or commission would keep us from returning to our Father in Heaven—the smallest judgmental thought—would keep us out.  And we of ourselves have absolutely zero power to rectify that, to fix it, and if we truly felt a part of the cost that Heavenly Father and the Savior paid to fix that for us, we would sacrifice and pay any price They asked of us.  We would accept all of our callings and assignments.  We would pay all of our tithing, follow the Word of Wisdom and have and keep a temple recommend.  We would make the sacrifices necessary to bring our lives in harmony with the principles being taught.  And as we learned new principles where we were not in line, we would make new sacrifices to bring our lives in harmony in those places.

D&C 97:8  Verily I say unto you, all among them who know their hearts are ^ahonest, and are broken, and their spirits contrite, and are ^bwilling to observe their covenants by ^csacrifice—yea, every sacrifice which I, the Lord, shall command—they are ^daccepted of me.

It is not enough to make covenants.  We must observe them.  The Lord tells us that we do that through sacrifice–and not just any sacrifice, but every sacrifice which I the Lord shall command—He gets to chose what the sacrifice is.

Elder Maxwell:  The only truly unique gift we can give our Heavenly Father is the complete submission of our will; all else we give Him is only returning the things He has given us.

Also, from Elder Maxwell’s biography:  ‘The true disciple develops, then, from accepting to appreciating, to adoring, and then emulating Christ.  Now Neal was seeing that emulating One who suffered as Jesus did also means the follower must somehow yield his own kind of full sacrifice. “If we are serious about our discipleship, Jesus will eventually request each of us to do those very things which are most difficult for us to do,” Elder Maxwell.  Within that process that process, the Savior blesses us with the gift of the Spirit—including charity—after all we can do.’

So then, personal application:
I was giving a presentation to my son’s third grade class about my ‘job’—being a stay at home mom.  They were studying the community and how the community is influenced by the work we all do.  I felt prompted to go in a speak in a very bold way about the work of mothers.  So I did.  We were discussing how many children we have and the teacher said, “Mrs. L. likes having children so much that she kept having them.”  In the moment, I did not correct her.  But after I got home and pondered her comment, I thought, I do not keep doing this because I like it.  It is very, very difficult for me and if I were doing what I wanted to do, I would not have done this so many times.  I do it because He asks me to.  Now, I am not going to go into any doctrine to justify my position.  This is a personal statement about my relationship with the Savior and what He has asked of ME.  But because of Elder Maxwell’s statement above, I am sure that for those of you who are serious in your discipleship, He has asked difficult things of you.  But they will be different than what He has asked of me.  And I have noticed, as I obey and receive the blessings of obedience, He again asks me to do that which is more difficult than what I have already done.  Have you noticed the same things??